So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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