i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
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I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
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The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I love you. Go after that dick
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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