I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize