i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize