is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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