True but thats because hes a fetus.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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