I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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