It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
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