One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize