Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
it glows. i had to have it.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
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