Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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