remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
it was like his penis was on wheels.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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