Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
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