she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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