WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize