At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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