Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize