just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize