i was born a porn star she said
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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