I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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