I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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