i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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