Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, beer. Big fan.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
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