so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Dignity is for republicans.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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