i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize