I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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