she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
it's like heaven, but drunker
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
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