he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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