I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
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How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
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