you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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