Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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