sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize