someone owes me an orgasm
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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