Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Randomize