yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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