I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize