I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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