I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
We just shotgunned beers for America
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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