dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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