ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
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She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
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NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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