i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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