We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
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