I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize