nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
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