Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize