in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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