I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize