She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize