So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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