Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I deserve to be covered in dicks
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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